Natalie Portman

Toronto Ontario - GO LEAFS GO!

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Natalie's Port-al "Let's Ride Through Together"
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Yes yes, this newsletter is mad late, but what can I say? I've been horrifcally busy, and to be perfectly honest, there just hasn't been much to write about lately. Anyway, never fear, much like my review for "Anywhere But Here", this will be a totally serious edition that will seriously discuss the seriousness of this serious movie.... this is serious, serious stuff, so let's get our serious faces on.

Anyway, before I start the review just a little preview of all the FUTURE newsletters that I'm going to be doing for a while. Every three weeks or so, whenever I have the time to churn another one of these suckers out, I'm going to write a review on Natalie's past movies- including THE PROFESSIONAL, BEAUTIFUL GIRLS, and everyone's fav, EPISODE 1. Stay tuned for those guys, cause those newsletters are gonna ROCK. Anyway, I'm going to QUICKLY fire this review off, because I just got back from watching The OASIS concert, and quite frankly I'm rather distracted.

Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, the movie...

Where the Heart Is - Review

**1/2 out of 5

The hardest thing to achieve in a movie, is balance. Whether its balance in tone, character, plot, dialogue- trying to achieve it as a writer and director can be quite a maddening task. Hence, this is where "WHERE THE HEART IS" fails, the newest movie by director MATT WILLIAMS, and of course, your favourite actress and mine, NATALIE PORTMAN.

Have you ever heard of the concept of the "spilled milk essay?" It's an essay with no structure, no drive, no thesis. Points are thrown in willy nilly, until what you're left with is a confused mess. That's exactly how WTHI feels. Like one plot device after another. So much happens so quickly, it seems rather silly. One scene of emotional weight after another, with another slab of melodrama on top, until you wonder why these people just don't go and end it all with a car engine and a garden hose.

The plot goes... well, actually, does the plot even matter? Because there really isn't one. There's actually five or six. The "fish out of water" plot, the "you get what you deserve" angle, the "home is wherever you can make it" story, the "appearances are decieving " idea, and so on and so forth. You could easily find six or seven movies in this sucker, but instead, we get something that feels bloated and confused.

The characters in the movie are the same cut-out "salt-o-the-earth" type that you'd expect. It seems like everyone in this little town has their own cute little role to play, until they stop becoming people, and begin becoming plot devices, who utter sitcom like lines with sitcom like delivery. How self aware are these characters? Do real people actually talk like this? Especially ones who are supposed to be "good ole' country folk?" No, not really. Ashley Judd's character for example names her children after snack foods, "Baby Ruth", adding to the popular trend in movies, that supporting characters have to be quirky up the YING/YANG in order to be interesting. I blame KRAMER for that kind of thinking. Director Matt Williams uses so many flashbacks and flash forwards, that we feel lost in the muck that was already almost impossible to navigate through. Maybe all the plot turns wouldn't be so coying if they weren't so improbable. There's one scene where Novalee (Natalie Portman) is being sucked up by a Tornado. She holds on to the stairs with one hand, and her baby with the other. Um, yeah, anything you say.

I don't really have a lot to write about WTHI. There really wasn't much to write about- unless you want to talk about Natalie's performance. Once again, she does a great job. Better than the ocassionally annoying, and horribly underwritten role she had in Anywhere But Here. But not nearly as good as the lovable, clever and smart Marty she played in Beautiful Girls. (A movie WTHIS could take some lessons from.) The southern accent is adequete, but somewhat forced- and the stupidity in the character is hardly ever endearing, even if the stupid character is being played by Natalie Portman. And for those of you who are going to go just to gawk at Nat, I don't know- I never much dug the pregnant look.

Yet for all the negative things I've said about WTHI, i'm still giving it a better review than ABH. Why? WTHI, unlike the hideously boring Anywhere But Here, at least has some kinetic movement to it. It doesn't labour on every single fake poinent moment, boring you into submission. It speeds through every single fake poinent moment. If you're going to make a painfully bad movie, at least make it quick.

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The Natalie Portman Newsletter

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